Love and Relationship Addiction

Celebrate Recovery provides a safe place to deal with the depression, isolation, lack of trust, and the unhealthy use of love and relationships as means of achieving worth, that are characteristics of Romance and Relationship Addictions.

Addicted to "LOVE" Characteristics are:

ROMANCE - THE ADDICTION CYCLE*

1. Obsession.

     Physical or emotional "trigger"

     Consumed by thoughts

     Plots, plans, schemes

     Loss of concentration

     Judgment impaired

2. THE HUNT.

     Driven to find relief

     Seeks out someone or something

     Point of no return

3. RECRUITMENT.

     Movement to resolve pain

     Enlistment, enticement, seduction

     Risk

4. GRATIFICATION.

     Object of hunt is attained

     Other person steps into desired role

     Thrill of conquest

     Victimization of other party

5. RETURN TO NORMAL.

     Feel calm, peaceful

     Switch turned off

     Mood altered

6. JUSTIFICATION.

     Pain resurfaces

     Rationalizations

     Depersonalization of victim

7. BLAME.

     Focus on own neglect or abuse

     Refuse to accept responsibility

     Lay problem at another's feet

8. SHAME.

     Blaming seems inadequate

     Horror at own actions

     What sort of person must I be?

     Stuff feelings

9. DESPAIR.

     Elation-depression cycle

     Utter despair

     Resolve to fix what is broken

10. PROMISES.

     "Never again" list of promises

     Fear of breaking promises

     Return to start of cycle

*from p.51 of Addicted to "Love" by Steve Arterburn

FIVE BASIC PRINCIPLES OF RECOVERY: Acceptance, confession, forgiveness, accountability, and love Benefits of recovery:

Recovery is meant to be far more than survival or another coping strategy. Recovery is to lead to an intimate relationship with Christ, and to a re-birth of the heart. The goal is for the healing of a broken and empty heart and the filling of that heart with a love for God, for others and for yourself. Life's central truth is that GOD LOVE US. Christ sacrifice himself because of His love for us. His sacrifice made it possible for us to be men and women who love.

Entering God's love, making it our own, and being able to share it with others - that is the goal of recovery.

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Celebrate Recovery meets every Friday night at River Valley Christian Fellowship Church in Bourbonnais.

©Celebrate Recovery